Local cobbler from Patna wants to make money by sponsoring shoes thrown at speakers

“The shoe that was thrown at the Speaker of the Assembly yesterday had been made by me,” proudly tells Bablu Ram, a cobbler who works at his small shop on Bailey Road in Patna. Bablu has been excited ever since the news came that a legislator had flung a shoe at the Speaker Udai Narain Chaudhary during the chaos that ruled the Assembly yesterday. The legislator was Bablu’s client. The cobbler is over the moon and says that his uncle has advised him to start sponsoring shoes and slippers that would be thrown at people speaking at meetings and assemblies. Bablu has rubbished proud claims by the Puma company that the shoe had been manufactured by them. 

This man, elected by people as an MLA,
proudly endorses slippers made by
his personal cobbler

Just like the Assembly situation is the buzz all over the country, Bablu Ram is the buzz among the cobbler community all over Patna. They don’t care about asylums being called Assembly Houses, and sanity-challenged people being called MLAs. The fact that a cobbler’s product reached as close as the left cheek of someone who would seem to be a respectable person, has made them proud. Bablu today is a symbol of pride for the community, and is proof that in the times of hypercritical democracy, cobblers and shoe companies can have a bigger say than even George W. Bush, let alone minnows like P. Chidambaram, Prime Minister Manmohan Singh and the latest, Udai Narain Chaudhary.

“If a shoe can become famous for being thrown at someone, why not the shoemaker? If the target is someone famous, he makes the shoe-thrower, the shoe-size and the shoe-maker famous,” says Bablu’s uncle.

The idea of sponsorship has instantly become famous, and the fast-growing sense of inhuman discipline among the human race has given shoemakers a new business prospect. Bablu has approached the legislator who threw the shoe at Chaudhary, to request him to make him a sponsor of all shoes he throws in future at random people. The legislator, however, has refused to entertain the request for some time, as he is still recovering from the fake trauma caused to him by the drama staged by the MLAs after their suspension.

Another scene from yesterday’s chaos:
Who will sponsor the pots?

“Why would anyone want to throw sponsored shoes at speakers and dignitaries? They already pay dearly by getting suspended and facing criminal action, why do you think they would pay extra for your “special” shoes?” we asked Bablu. But Bablu retorted, “If they have to pay for it that way, why do they throw shoes in the first place? I’m confident that people would be willing to throw sponsored shoes. It will not only boost our business, but also make shoeing a fashion fad. If the trend gets more popular, the government should make shoeing legal and give a Right to Shoe just like the Right to Vote. If we can elect our representatives, we should also have the right to remove them whenever we want.”

About the author

Tanay Sukumar

I founded this website in 2009. I served as Editor-in-Chief from November 2009 to May 2013.
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