#Products

Clever Zandu Balm attacks Himani Fast Relief, suggests new lyrics — Himani Badnaam Hui


Mumbai: 
This product’s manufacturers think
that raising hue and cry will help
them sell more, somehow.
Publicity stunts have come a long
way since Archimedes’
naked parade.
As if anyone understood the actual meaning of the line Main Zandu Balm Hui (“I became a Zandu Balm”) of a song in the movie Dabangg, Zandu Pharmaceuticals have sent a notice to producer Arbaaz Khan. They are reportedly upset with the use of the their brand name so many times in the unusually superhit song Munni Badnaam Hui, Darling Tere Liye. NTMN has a copy of the notice sent by Zandu Pharmaceuticals, and it has suggested them to change the title of the song itself, if the lyricist is unable to alter the lines with “Zandu Balm”. The suggested title is Himani Badnaam Hui, with intended competition to product Himani Fast Relief.

Himani Fast Relief — Dard Mitaaye Chutki Mein
Can it relieve Zandu’s pain?
“In the song, they use the brand name of my clients continuously at several places. My clients have been doing brilliant work for decades now, and are a reputed brand name. Despite the use of the name so many times, unfortunately, somehow the sales of Zandu Balm have remained the same, because evidently, people still hurt and sprain themselves as much as they did before Dabangg. So, they want me to threaten legal action on your production house, if you fail to alter the lyrics,” said the notice from Zandu’s lawyer.

The notice further read, “However, we have a compromise deal in place. If the title of the song could be renamed Himani Badnaam Hui, it would perhaps be helpful in maligning (badnaam) the name of our closest competitor in market, Emami’s Himani Fast Relief. We wouldn’t file a case then. Our market experts have predicted a decline in Emami’s profits and repute, if this happens; because the song is such a rage across India.”

Himani Badnaam Hui, Zandu Tere Liye!
Zandu’s market experts have predicted that, in order to get back profits and repute, Emami will have to either increase their product’s cost from Rs 5 to Rs 25, or will have to “provide relief a bit faster“, at least in half a chutki. Brand Ambassador of Himani Fast Relief, Amitabh Bachchan is angry at the suggestion, and has accused Zandu Pharmaceuticals of unhealthy competition. He promptly tweeted, “I’ll not stop endorsing Himani Fast Relief, even if becomes badnaam, because I still want to be seen on TV in every commercial break.

“Going by their ideology of ek balm teen kaam (translation: “three effects with a single balm”, or “three wickets in a single ball”, or “three madhouses in a single Rakhi Sawant brain”), with a single song, they are doing three kaams — (a) providing pain to media and the movie producers, (b) getting great publicity for free due to the song, and, (c) still crying like small children,” said advertisement expert Prahlad Kakkar. “We are glad that our item song has become all about items now,” said a source close to producer Arbaaz Khan.

About the author

Tanay Sukumar

I founded this website in 2009. I served as Editor-in-Chief from November 2009 to May 2013.
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