In a press brief after the meeting, held at 3am, UPA spokesperson Abhishek Manu Singhvi asserted that all such protests start with someone dreaming of uprooting the government and trying to
stabilize destabilize the country. “And then, it takes the form of a cannon ball with all you people and media supporting that one man! It’s very necessary to nip them in the budding stage itself, so that they never gather momentum.” On being asked how this would work, he was initially hesitant to reveal all secrets, but then let the lathi out of the bag— “Scientists have been directed to build a machine which can keep a track of all the revolutionary dream waves that flow from different parts of the country with the help of a dedicated satellite. This data would alert the nearest police station and such people will be lathicharged immediately, while they are still in their dreams.”
He was visibly miffed with the ongoing trend in the country where some people decide to sit on indefinite hunger strikes to demand something
reasonable unreasonable. “It’s like 2-year-old kids refusing to eat just because they want what they think is right for them. The government can not obviously fulfill everybody’s demands. All these tantrums are not going to affect the government.”
“Do you even know how much hard work it takes to earn black money and be corrupt? It’s not easy to have only trained scamsters in the government. Where do you get such ministers who show the world that we are not a poor country? And then, someone has a silly dream of rooting out corruption from the country. Oh! Please get a life!”
About why the dreaming people were the new target, he linked the importance of dreams to real events. “Gandhiji dreamt of a free India and he achieved it. Napoleon, Hitler and General Dyer dreamt of being tyrants and they achieved it. So better be safe than sorry. Kill them while they’re dreaming!” he said.
He also hinted that the government would bring a bill against dreaming people and would try to make such acts punishable under the Prevention of Internal Peace Disturbance act in the Monsoon session.