This article was first published as a guest post, for Thoughts in Play.
Every young person in the modern urban setup of life would definitely have a story to narrate wherein a guy “used” a girl for short-stayed “amusement”, before moving on to another girl, once getting “bored” of the first. The guy remains one in number, while girls populate, and abandon (no, get abandoned from) his life. This is another modern-life example of how we treat our girls. The girl needed love, felt she was getting it; the guy needed pleasure, he knew he was getting it. The worst event which summarises the misfortunes and poor luck of womankind, is, when at the narration session of all such stories at a table of old school and college friends, it is the girl who takes the “stupid” tag and is laughed at, while the guy is never treated with anything close to hate and disrespect. To the guy involved, the girl becomes a souvenir of some form of gallantry and bravery, not a mark of shame.
A group of men discussing women presents the most disgusting conversation transcript. While a group of women would discuss men more in the sense of joking, a group of men discusses women in the sense of ridiculing. Men make it a point to discuss women in a way that reflects the slavery of one gender and the mastery of the other. Women, instead, discuss men in a way that reflects the stupidity of one gender and the cleverness of the other. And dear male world, mend your ways or not, you know exactly who is right and justified.
Forget the “ghar pe maa-behen nahi hai kya” crap. It is just a meaningless way to silence an offender for a moment. For, having a mother and sister at home is not the only—or any—reason he should be expected to respect women. (Analogy: Having a home isn’t the reason one would be expected to help in keeping somebody else’s home clean! Having a television at home doesn’t mean one would not break another person’s television! Having a life to live is no reason one should be expected to respect another life! All these are, rather obvious and expected of you as a person!)
What we subject the girl or lady to, is obviously not respect. It is “free entertainment” without an entertainment tax. A particular woman is meant to be a complement to a man; a whole womankind not meant to be a commodity to him! A woman is a piece of life and heart, modesty and humanity, just as a man is; she is not a piece of sexual and visual satisfaction at will. Nature does provide us with sexual preference and understanding, but why not give a thought before choosing any—just any—woman’s silhouette to exercise our sexual imagination on? Why use a woman’s presence to give ourselves any bit of satisfaction? Does she agree to it? Obviously, she doesn’t. After all, you wouldn’t accept if an unknown woman chose to throw the responsibility of paying for her bus fare to you, in return of you refusing to take your eyes off her. (That would be too minor a compensation, though, for disturbing the modesty of a woman, which bears no equal.) For all this, a woman does indeed deserve what all you deny her. She is the gender which balances your life and keeps it stable.
It sounds natural on discussion that the society is unfair, but then, wherefrom does the mentality breed? It starts from the society itself; the poison that is fed into the minds of young boys by other young boys, reduces womankind to a luxury, and not a companion, gifted by Nature. Apart from such social inspirations, a more modern form of bad inspiration comes from the easy availability of pornography, which gives an easy illusion to still-immature minds, of women being an easily-accessible slave meant for the pleasures of man. Rape incidents that blot the world around us are evidence of this mentality. Before bringing the urge into action, an offending man doesn’t care about who the woman is, where her self-respect and her future go to after this deed. For him she is a woman, not an individual. Isn’t this pathetic! I repeat, just having a mother and sister at home is not why you should know how to treat a woman. If not giving specific respect, then treating a woman as yet another human, is plain obvious, not as a outcome of having a mother and sister in your life, but as an evidence of the sanity of your mind.
This post talks about men in extreme generality. It may look hypocritical, if you happen to be a man, good enough to be called a man.