“The Roadies interview was horrible for me. I couldn’t do a single thing. They changed my attitude towards life.”

Campus News:
Earlier this week, a shocking incident took place during a viva exam held in Yet Another College of Engineering (YACE). It is reported that one particular computer engineering student lost all his senses and broke into a series of actions which might change the way vivas are conducted forever.

Gandom Ruy, a 2nd year student, was a calm and decent chap according to his teachers and friends. Some believe what happened during the viva was just a manifestation of the Roadies interview round trauma he suffered recently: “I had seen him at the Roadies audition very recently! At first I couldn’t believe my eyes. Gandom can’t even introduce himself properly, what Roadies audition could he give?!” said Fome Sriend.

NTMN approached the internal teacher, Mrs. Tant Ceach, to find out what exactly happened. But apparently she was yet to recover from the shock. On further questioning, Mrs. Ceach refused to answer and insisted that she could not waste further time, as she had to sign-without-actually-checking the first pages of 10-page long assignments submitted by students some time earlier this year.

“I was glad when I saw that he would sit for the viva along with me,” said Piva Vartner. “Since he had never interacted much in class so I thought I could totally dominate him during the vivas but… well, the external was angry even with me. He threatened he would fail me. I told him that I had read the book 4 times, and moreover, since I am a girl, he could not fail me even if he wanted to. But he was really angry.” She broke down uncontrollably.

What actually happened? Students from another batch who were seated in the same room performing their practical told us the entire story. According to them, Gandom sat down and started giving his introduction right away to the external examiner. However, he was talking more about his opinions on homosexuality than himself. He started his hullabaloo when the external asked him, “What would you do to enter ten in the binary system.” Apparently Gandom heard it as, “What would you do to entertain us?” — a very popular question on the Roadies interviews and Gandom took this as a cue to start with his monkeying-around activities. He stood up and swiftly dropped fifty push-ups with his feet rested on the examiner’s table. While some say he cleared the table to perform a full split, most maintain that he was trying to dance on the table and accidentally ended up in the full split.

When the external asked him if he was alright, Gandom is said to have replied in abusive words. He then went on to sing the Bhaag D K Bose chorus repeatedly until the examiner lost his cool and left, thus making Gandom immortal in the history of all vivas ever.

We got a chance to ask Gandom about his actions and this is what he said, “The Roadies interview was horrible for me. I couldn’t do a single thing. They changed my attitude towards life. I know now that talking about one’s views on homosexuality a lot during the introduction, 50-odd push-ups and a full split are sufficient to get through any one-on-one interview session. That is how many people have cleared the Roadies interview round, so how can these vivas be any different?! I’m pretty much sure I’ve made an impact, and I’m hoping to score a 14 on 15 in my vivas.”

Appalled by the student’s behaviour, the external, Mr. Shadus Kadist said that he was going to call for an immediate meet of the Union of Viva Examiners in order to discuss better ways of taking vivas. He said, “Maybe the fault is not in them. It’s with us… maybe Mr. Sapil Kibal will exert his righteous changes on this system too?”

Shortly after the meet, sources said that there were temporary plans of setting up “viva centres” where students would be tied to a chair and questioned. Water might be the fluid thrown on the student’s face in case he/she tends to lose focus or is unable to answer.  While it was decided that these centres would be placed in a way that would mean extra and unnecessary eleventh hour travelling for the students to get to the centres, the duration of an individual viva was left undecided.

Gandom may have tried to implement what he learned from that Roadies interview, but in the process he has ensured some serious changes in the viva structure.