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154 die of hunger as Jayalalithaa skips a meal in prison


In distressing news coming in from Tamil Nadu, 154 people have died of hunger in the last 24 hours after the former Chief Minister Jayalalithaa skipped a meal in prison yesterday.

The most common cause of death is being reported as “love” for the yesteryear film star, though more keen observers suggest it to be a case of “one-sided love”, given the fact that Jayalalithaa herself is unharmed.

This is said to be the highest toll ever since the 1990s, when 166 people complained of diarrhoea across Tamil Nadu after Jayalalithaa ate some bad-quality fast food.

Retaliation for Amma’s wrongful imprisonment

Jayalalithaa_Re1

“You cannot make me eat today”

The revered “Amma”, who has been wrongly rewarded a four-year prison sentence, has not gone down well with sane human beings. Many have responded by hanging and self-immolating themselves in support of the service to the nation that corruption is.

In fact, 123 of the 154 deaths in the last 24 hours occurred even before the news of Jayalalithaa’s fast was revealed to the public. This has resulted in speculations about a wireless network of love and hero-worship.

“We were dreading over for long whether the shocking piece of news should be let out or not,” said a prison spokesperson. The sensitive news was kept under wraps for hours, before it finally got leaked today morning.

“Not hungry as long as Amma eats”

Research into the victims reveals that some of these 154 people have not consumed any food for years, as Jayalalithaa has been eating on their behalf. “My brother used to say that as long as Amma is eating, he knows no hunger,” said the brother of a victim, talking of the love his brother had for the popular icon.

As a safety measure, jail authorities have been instructed to maintain discretion in revealing news about Jayalalithaa.


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Tanay Sukumar

I founded this website in 2009. I served as Editor-in-Chief from November 2009 to May 2013.
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