A leading website, Jhingalala, is offering Virtual Live-in Flats (VLFs) to accommodate virtual social network relationships. As cited in one of their advertisements, they offer fully furnished virtual flats with all the facilities; be it the love quotes for when one will be in extreme need of them; or the bundles of emoticons that one will need from time to time; or the ‘A’ rated videos that a couple might wish to enjoy while together; all will be availed to the buyer in the same flat at astonishingly low prices.
A painful background story?
Inventor of the VLFs, a young engineer from Yet Another College of Engineering, tells NTMN how he came up with the idea: “I met this girl on Facebook and instantly fell in love with her, when she “liked” a couple of my statuses. Surprisingly, she also had feelings for me, as I had commented on her display pictures! When I asked her to move in with me, she turned it down saying she could not move to another city just for me and that she preferred staying at Facebook instead. That was really heart-breaking. One fine day, I was drinking and smoking with my friends, and I said to myself, “Why not do something about it? Something very real.” And the very next instant, the idea of virtual flats popped up inside my head. Suddenly, it felt like life had never been easier!”
Pre-bookings start; competitors gear up
The huge number of pre-bookings for the flats is an indicator of what a huge phenomenon these flats have proven to be. People are even calling it the ‘Deal of a Lifetime’. We talked to a buyer of the VLF and asked about how he was feeling after finally possessing his flat. He replied, “Dude! This thing is, like, totally cool! You get the benefits of a live-in relationship such as putting up your relationship status as “committed” without having to go through any of the usual shit like talking, holding hands, looking at each others’ faces! Highly recommended, bro! I am hoping Facebook comes up with a ‘Add as a VLF partner’ option.”
Many competitors of Jhingalala have also started selling similar virtual flats. Along with the flats, they are offering many other lucrative perks, with home loans topping the list. Specimen flats have been made available to the buyers to let them have the whole feel of ‘live-in’ in these flats. For singles, opposite/same sex avatars are available for trial runs. A couple can try a specimen flat and then pay in full or in instalments for the flat they wish to buy.
VLFs boast of exciting new features
This new development has turned into reality what was only a distant dream for most love birds. A boon in disguise, this system will remove all the constraints that lovers face while being in a relationship. The flats are installed with automatic systems in the (virtual) toilets that put the seat covers down to avoid the age-old toilet-seat argument between the ladies and the men. These flats allow the men to hide their stash of adult movies in the part that would be accessible only to them without any knowledge to the ladies. The ladies are demanding an auto check in/out update system for whenever their men enter/leave the flat, but this has not been met with much appreciation and is still not decided upon.
This system also handles break-ups pretty efficiently. The flats can be vacated without any hassles and can be passed on to a friend in need almost immediately. The virtual nature of the flats ensures zero damage and the low maintenance charges attract more and more buyers.
Critics criticise; Gen X loves it
As with any great invention, there are critics of the VLFs too. Some old-fashioned people believe it is an unhealthy move and should be discouraged. With weak arguments like “Two people in love, living together virtually is absurd and unnatural”, “This would only create an illusion of togetherness and could lead to serious troubles later”, they hardly have a case. Ignoring the rant of the oldies, the new generation cannot wait to fall in love and move in with the one person with whom they have shared details of everything: the edited pictures of their trips, of the outfits they have tried in malls, of the food they ate in the morning, of the cute dog they saw on the street; for there is no love greater than the one that stems from a common favourite social network. This definitely is the real (virtual) deal!
This article has been inspired by recent events of men and women committing suicides after experiencing break-ups in their Facebook relationships. We maintain that the best way to move on from a social network break-up is to “poke” the wits out of him/her. The Lok Adalat had recently directed a man to spend equal time with his wife and his live-in partner. VLFs may be able to help out people with such predicaments.
Editing: Dharna Chauhan; Concept: Kumar Pratik