God diagnosed with diabetes as lakhs of students offer prasad and prayers to clear exams

Kumar Pratik, May 25, 2013

With semester exams imminent, college students all around the country are going to temples to offer prayers and prasad in return for the favour of passing the examinations with flying colours. This has resulted in the unfortunate situation of God being diagnosed with diabetes.

Leading the charge are engineering students, who are credited as the pioneers of “finding easy ways to pass an exam”. Medical students also have adopted the means of offering prasad as the last resort after months of studies, stating that they cannot take the risk of depending solely on their hard-work. Commerce and Delhi University students are said to be simply following the trend.

NTMN caught up with Hatash Vidyarthi, a student from Yet Another College of Engineering, who has offered a record amount of sweets and prayers at shrines across the nation.

“I remember it like yesterday,” he said. I was playing FIFA ’13 the night before my first end-semester exam. I still had about eight chapters to study, out of the eight-and-a-half in the syllabus. The clock struck twelve, and somehow I instantly knew that I would never be able to finish the course in time. After the divine realisation, I started running, and kept running until I had found myself in the nearby temple.”

Hatash Vidyarthi then rang the temple-bell till his hands were dead enough to “not be able to even lift a pen”. He offered a bag of laddoos to lord Ganesha, and pledged to walk to the exam-centre with bare feet. “Next day, I had the best paper in my life,” he said. “And that’s how it all started.”

After consuming sweets offered by lakhs of such students from the country, God has shown hazardous sugar levels in blood tests. He has thus become angry with the students and is said to be thinking about breaking his promise. Doctors in heaven have warned students and adults to stop bribing God with sweets and promises.

Students are still seem adamant to seek short-cuts. They have written to the doctors asking if sugarfree sweets can be offered to the sick God.

(concept: Satat Mishra)

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